Bullying, Discrimination and Exclusions
- Bullying
- What signs should I look for if I think my child is being bullied?
- What if I think my child is a bully?
- How can I encourage my child not to be a bystander?
- E-safety and Cyberbullying
- Disability Discrimination
- Exclusions
Bullying
Children with special needs are more at risk of bullying. Sometimes they may be accused of bullying others too, or encouraged to join in unkind behaviour that they do not understand or because they want to be part of a group. Bullying is very distressing for children and parents, but there are things you can do to support your child if you think they are being bullied. The first step is to talk to your child. You will need to reassure them and listen to how they would like you to help. It is a good idea to let them help you come up with a plan and they feel they have some control over it.
You should also then talk to the school. All schools should have an anti-bullying policy which is available to all parents. They often have a guide for parents too which may help. They should take your concerns seriously and help work out a plan to ensure your child feels safe and supported in school and the bullying stops.
For more help and information.
- Call the National Bullying Helpline
- For more information on Bullying in School visit Bullying UK
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Nottinghamshire County Council Anti-bullying coordinator- Lorna Naylor offers help and advice to schools and other county council setting and parents. She can be contacted through they county council help line
Tel : 08449 808080
What signs should I look for if I think my child is being bullied?
• Not wanting to go on the school bus, begging for a lift to school
• Refusing to go to school, feeling ill in the mornings, truanting
• Beginning to do poorly at school work
• Coming home regularly with clothes or books destroyed, possessions going missing
• Coming home starving ( had dinner money taken)
• Asking for money or stealing money, losing their pocket money
• Becoming withdrawn, lacking confidence, distressed and anxious and refusing to say why
• Poor sleeping, nightmares
• Unexplained bruises, scratches etc
• Beginning to bully other siblings or be aggressive and unreasonable
• Giving improbable excuses to explain any of the above
What if I think my child is a bully?
• Stay calm and don’t get angry, your child might be going through a difficult time causing them to act out aggressive feelings
• Talk to them about why they bully and what they think they might do to stop.
• Reassure them that it is the behaviour you don’t like not them
• Work out away for your child to make amends for the bullying
• Work with the school or other setting to support you in helping to change your child’s behaviour and keep in touch with progress
• Give lots of positive feedback for good behaviour and opportunities to shine
How can I encourage my child not to be a bystander?
• See it, get help, and stop it.
• Tell them that by not doing anything they are encouraging the bully
• Support them if they decide to tell the bully to stop but only if they feel safe to do so
• Listen and support them if they tell you about bullying
• Tell them not to forward unkind messages via email or texting
E-safety and Cyberbullying
Children and young people's use of the internet has become a major concern for parents, and children with special needs are particularly vulnerable. Cyberbullying, contact with inappropriate adults and giving too much personal information are some of the problems parents may face if they do not help their children use the internet safety.
Disability Discrimination
Schools are covered by the Disability Discrimination Act (DDA). This means they must not treat your child less favourably than other children for a reason to do with their disability. And they must take reasonable steps to make sure that disabled children coming to the school will not be put at a disadvantage. This applies to all aspects of school life from admissions to school trips, although not to major physical alterations to school buildings (They are expected to make long-term plans for improving access to their buildings through their planning duties). The Equality and Human Rights Commission publishes a Code of Practice which explains how the DDA applies to schools which you can download or order from their website. All schools have to produce a Disability Equality Scheme which sets out how they will promote the interests of disabled people in all aspects of school life.
If you feel a school has discriminated against your child, you may be able to use the DDA to protect their interests. For example refusing to let a child start school because they wear nappies could be discrimination under the DDA and the school may need to rethink their attitude. But in each situation you will need to get some more advice first.
For more help and information visit the Equality and Human Rights Commission website.
Exclusions
Children with special needs are at extra risk of being excluded at some point in their school life. Sometimes it is only when your child faces exclusion that you realise they have special needs that are not being met at school. It is a very worrying time for parents and children. You need to get good advice. Nottingham and Nottinghamshire Parent Partnership Service can offer advice and support to parents of children who are excluded, where there is a link between the exclusion and special needs.The Parent Partnership Service may be able to support parents at exclusion hearings, contact with PPS is needed to determine level of support.
For more help and information:
- Call the PPS Helpline for initial advice
- Ring the national exclusions information line run by the Advisory Centre for Education 0808 800 0327 (24 hour answerphone service)
Parents of children with special needs also often find that schools ask them to collect their child early or send them home whenever there is a problem. Sometimes they suggest that the child only comes to school part-time. Even though the school does not call this a formal exclusion, it is excluding the child in practice. Frequent informal exclusions of this kind may be a sign that your child is not getting the support they need. Raise this with the school.